The meal of the century deserves better pictures, folks.

I’ve let Mozza down.

If you want overexposed, washed out food photos, you’ve come to the right place!

Am I even worthy of attempting a review??

Mozza is crazy popular and annoyingly hard to get a reservation at, for a reason.

Face it, haters (or poor people). It’s just that good.

I’ve never been one to follow trends, go with the flow or do what everyone else was doing.

If collars are being worn up, mine are going down. If everyone is listening to Adele, I will personally spearhead an Adele smear campaign. I’m sure there are subliminal satanic lyrics there somewhere. I shall find them, you voluptuous beast!

Eventually, just like with bad reality television, I could no longer resist Mozza’s siren-esque draw.

Are the items from the Mozzarella bar really that tasty?


Does the famous Orecchiette pasta taste like you’re eating an amazing sausage pizza?

Huh? (The correct answer is yes, people).

Is the Porcini Rubbed Rib Eye the BEST DAMNED STEAK in existence?

For $78, it had better not be anything else.

Can I really describe the flavors going on?

It was like Mozza had invented this magical elixir simply called “YUM” and marinated the meat hunk in it for a full year.

Could I have done SO much better with this blog posting?

No. Because I’m still on cloud nine from this meal and it will be at least another 24 hours before I begin to self deprecate again.

P.S. – Note the snobby look of disappointment when people ask you to clarify WHICH Mozza you’ve been to? “OH, the Pizzeria….yeah, that’s good too.”

6602 Melrose Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90038
(323) 297-0100

Grilled Octopus with Potatoes, Celery and Lemon

Burricotta with radicchio, spiced walnuts, honey and fried rosemary

Bufallo Mozzarella wrapped in Pancetta alla Pizzaiola

Orecchiette with Sausage and Swiss Chard

Porcini Rubbed Rib Eye Bistecca - AUTO

Porcini Rubbed Rib Eye Bistecca - MANUAL

Bombolini - huckleberry marmellata & lemon mascarpone