Picture it, Dorothy. Sicily. 1942….

I’m not sure what made me think of the Golden Girls but I would imagine the temperature inside of Ramenya would be about quadruple that of whatever sweltering Italian cafe Sophia Petrillo first met her husband at.

The owners of Ramenya, who clearly have fled Japan to escape criminal charges for boiling their customers to death, have two fans in their restaurant.

And they’re both pointed directly at the staff.

On one of the hottest days of the year, in one of the hottest restaurants on earth, I decide to sit above a nice, steaming bowl of soup. Smart, Bun Boy.

As I begin to stockpile napkins by the truckload and sweat grotesquely through my shirt, I still must admit how delicious my ramen was!

Picture it. Spicy egg drop soup. Add ground pork. Add noodles.

Incredible.

Three children enter the restaurant and sit down at a table next us.

Their mother joins them minutes later.

She sits down.

Then, immediately stands up.

“Are you kidding me??!” she snaps. “Let’s go to Asahi Ramen instead”

I envy the cool breezes they will soon experience.

As I look below at my never ending meal, I have to wonder if perhaps I’m refilling the bowl with my own sweat.

I can just picture the zingers Dorothy and Sophia would come up with when they saw this on their table: