Why didn't I order this??

There used to be a woman living in my apartment building named SM from Minnesota.

We were really close friends. She’d always throw dinner parties, experimenting with new recipes.

We’d go downtown for dim sum and cheap chinese flip flops. She introduced me to the Movies in the Cemetery and helped foster my current love of cooking.

We’d make fun of the way she said Pumpkin (Punkin) and Put (Pert)

She was my buddy to explore LA with, she was a hoot.

Then she went Koo Koo.

She began getting paranoid, she thought her bosses at work had hired two of our fellow neighbors to spy on her, tap her phones and to go through her mail!

She started becoming distant yet even more eccentric.

When we were drinking by our pool one evening, she pointed to the stars and said “See those stars? That’s where I’m from.”

She once said “I’m gonna chop his head off and put it on top of my TV”

We all suspected she was Bipolar, she shopped like crazy and hid half of Crate and Barrel in her spare bedroom which she FORBADE anyone to enter.

She had some serious mood swings.

She acted like she was on meth.

It was all very, very sad.

She began assuming everyone in our building had been hired by her firm and soon wouldn’t talk to anyone.

She began gaining weight and would hardly ever leave her apartment.

One day, she told us she was moving out but wouldn’t tell us where she was going.

Then she disappeared.

She responded quite vaguely to one of my emails a year or so back but I haven’t heard from her since.

I miss you, SM!

Oh, and I went to the Counter and my friend ordered the burger pictured above. I ordered a piece of crap chicken sandwich which I refused to take a picture of. I was bitter. A Bitter Brenda.