Welcome to Hollywood, folks. Nothing says Hollywood like Cahuenga BLVD.

Or wearing sunglasses inside dark restaurants.

Both apply to Kitchen 24.

Kitchen 24 (I’m already sick of typing it) who’s hours of operation might surprise you (open 24 hours) is a good attempt. Decent food, good service. Nothing amazing.

This place is embracing the inevitable. Wherever pretentious Hollywood assholes choose to dine, that establishment will naturally become very…Hollywood.

Clyde and I decided to dine here (both being confirmed assholes) because it’s where I wanted to go. Like an obedient puppy, he does what I tell him to.

I just didn’t think he would completely plagiarize my food order. Like losers, we both decided on the Big Baller!

Not so big…but contained balls.

The Big Baller is their version of a meatball sandwich, however, missing its top. Very Hollywood to keep it low carb. The meatballs were so excellent, I did not mind one bit.

Now, let’s get to the French fries.

FRY FAIL.

They were both dry and greasy. A feat unto itself. They were also hard and nearly hollow. They were truly awful, I only had a few. A few hundred.

The list of negative aspects did not deter Clyde from finishing almost every last one of them, complaining he was quite full afterwards. That also did not stop him and our big boobed waitress from relentlessly flirting with each other. It was quite nauseating.

I spent the entire meal trying to determine if two girls in the joint were, in fact, reality show stars. Neither of them was.

One wore her ugly 80’s sunglasses under her mop of straw-like blond hair. I was intimidated at how important she probably was.

And the other woman, who kept staring at me every time I shoved a bite of meatball in my mouth, looked like that wig wearing white chick from the Real Housewives of Atlanta show.

Kitchen 24. Would I go back? Definitely.

But I would make sure I purchased some designer jeans first. Oh, and there had BETTER be at least one reality star there. Not just a lookalike.

1608 N Cahuenga Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90028
(323) 465-2424
www.kitchen24.info