Aww…life in Venice Beach….it’s quite nice.

Except that damn dog next door won’t stop yipping.

Thelma and Louise met me Sunday morning for a bike ride from Venice to Santa Monica. It was a nice relaxing workout on a perfect sunny day.

It started out a bit rocky, however, when Thelma ran her bike into the car in front of her. I don’t think she appreciated it when I burst out laughing. Sorry Thelma.

During the ride, I muttered several nasty remarks at the tourists who were in my way, walking leisurely on the “bikes only” path. To teach them a lesson, I would swoosh very close to them as I passed, nearly knocking off their imposter designer sunglasses which were most likely purchased minutes ago.

After surviving the bike ride, we headed back to the apt. to freshen up before lunch. By freshen up, I mean Thelma washed out her smelly armpits and dried them on my only clean towel. Thanks.

We were a bit rough looking from our ride. Louise had dirt all over her white t-shirt. So, all dolled up, we walked to Hal’s Bar and Grill, making sure I walked in first as to prevent the hostess from thinking we were either looking for a handout or were applying for the available dishwasher job.

Luckily Venice is super casual, so even going to the nicer restaurants like Hal’s, you can definitely dress down. Even if “down” means wearing spandex shorts. Oh Thelma…

I ordered the Turkey sandwich only because I was OVERJOYED to see it contained real turkey breast meat and not sodium-filled pressed meat product. Yeah!

The fries were better than the sandwich. They were definitely made there. I think. Ok, I’m not sure at all, but they were good. The sandwich was good too, but the issue with any turkey meal, is that, as turkey is a drier meat, I usually require…let’s say…a shitload of gravy poured on top to balance things out.

I instead dipped the sammie in my ketchup. Not ideal. What would have been nice is if I would have ordered a side of their basil mayo to dip it in. There was a small amount on the sandwich. Which would have been ample for most folks.

Ok, I’m bored of this review now. Just got back from Bay Cities Deli with some friends. Hal’s is paling in comparison. Time for a food coma….

VENICE, CA 90292