The Bazaar is a very hip, confusingly decorated restaurant in the new SLS Hotel. I dined here with friends “Siegfried and Roy” and I.H. at the only reservation we could get, 10 O’Clock!

I amused myself by picturing my parents entering the obscenely trendy lobby of this obscenely trendy hotel with their mismatching suitcases and their neon fannypacks. Oh boy. It was almost as funny as imagining my supremely impatient and claustrophobic father at Disneyland. Or in a line of more than two cars at a stop light, for that matter! “Damn gridlock!”

Anyways, we decided to arrive at 9 to grab a drink in the bar, Bar Centro, prior to our late dinner. I ordered something called the Jale Berry. It was a blackberry jalapeno gin drink and it was fantastic, right up my alley. Each sip had a surprising bite. I even coughed repeatedly after the first sip, like an idiot.

We were finally seated by our very gracious hostess. And our waitress was incredibly helpful and pleasant. Unlike what I’ve read online. In fact, I was a bit nervous as there are some not so nice reviews of this place. I had images of a bunch ‘o bitches either laughing at or completely ignoring us!

Thank god we brought a few bottles of wine, cuz this place ain’t cheap. Groceries and gas next week? Um..not anymore! I have priorities.

We then proceeded to order about 15 items on the menu to share. Since this place served tapas, we basically were able to enjoy only a bite of each item. Although, the decor was certainly not anything like my much more authentic Spanish experience on Tuesday. It was like some odd upscale antique store, people were actually browsing the random items in the glass cases.

Get ready, folks! Here is a rundown of everything we ate:

Pa’amb tomaquet Catalan Style toasted bread, Manchego, tomato * I.H. didn’t really care for this, but I thought it was a nice start.

Not your everyday Caprese Cherry tomatoes, liquid mozzarella *Wow! Those aren’t mozzarella balls by the way, but liquid mozzarella that explodes in your mouth. Or in your hand if you touch it. But you shouldn’t be touching your salad, silly.

Buñuelos codfish fritters, honey alioli *Traditional, good.

Japanese taco Grilled eel, shiso, cucumber, wasabi, chicharrón *Great idea, I didn’t realize I was eating eel and freaked out a bit, but it was delicious.

Crab meat steamed buns Pickled Japanese cucumbers *I didn’t eat one, but on a side note, these little suckers were $18 bucks!

Tuna ceviche and avocado roll *The most bland thing ordered.

Norwegian lobster seaweed salad, lobster essence *A freebie! We got $50 bucks worth of lobster compliments of one of the chefs, who was a contestant on Top Chef, Chicago! I don’t eat shellfish, but decided to have one bite. I struggled through it, probably making an ass of myself with my contorted facial expressions. Yes, it was tasty. But, that’s not the point!

Ottoman carrot fritters, Pistachio sauce *One of my favorites! Very dilly. I.H. and Siegfried did not like them. “I don’t like dill”, the jerk commented. Guess who got one crammed down her throat??

Croquetas de pollo chicken and béchamel fritters *The best thing on the menu in my opinion. Can’t go wrong with fried meat and cheese. I’ll say it over and over. And you’d better listen.

“Philly cheesesteak” Air bread, cheddar, Wagyu beef *It looks weird, and this two bite sensation costs $8 bucks, but it really tasted like a Philly Cheesteak! The meat was cooked to perfection.

American caviar cone *Siegfried ordered this, I don’t think I eat caviar. Should I?

And finally, our laughable but tasty desert. Each miniscule piece was $3 bucks!

All and all, we had a very fun, adventurous and scrumptious night!

Oh! I forgot to mention that the picture at the top is Roy eating a stick of foie gras wrapped in cotton candy! Foie gras is either duck or goose liver. I opted out of eating this strange object. I don’t think it got rave reviews.

The waitress even brough I.H. a to-go coffee cup jam-packed with extra cotton candy! Sugar high!

465 S. La Cienega BLVD
Los Angeles, CA 90068
(310) 247-0400
www.thebazaar.com